My submissive journey: sleep

Showing posts with label sleep. Show all posts

Digging into the Underworld

So according to kiwi the moral of yesterdays story was to not watch any more Underworld. Well that's easily done since we watched the last one yesterday. No i didn't sleep well. Another benzo* night but not as bad at all. So yes stupid, but i'm glad i did it. I have to get past it at some point, and who better to try it with than Sir?
I think there's an even bigger moral to the story though, and that is that you guys are a lot more freak-tolerant than i give you credit for!

Luffs ya guys! All of you.

The actual intolerance of the self-avowed tolerant -- are they really tolerant and accepting, or are they actually intolerant and unaccepting, pretending to be tolerant and accepting? ?

Sir and i haven't quite gotten back to where we were a few days ago yet, but i hope we're getting there -i need SEX!! *lol* After 5 times a day for a few days, going to Vanilla standards just doesn't cut it =P OK, so he did give me an orgasm (thank you Sir!) -but let's face it, it's not the same is it? I need both =P *greed subbie* We've even been low on BJ's! OK much of that is due to me fucking up my jaw during that car-ride-BJ from the summer *lol*
That and the fact that my tits were kinda-killed-by-mauling during the last one *LOL* I'm sure the break is soon over though ;)

On that note i'll post what many of you probably find annoying (but at least i have ck on my side =P), yes you guessed, my horoscope. Today i like it!

Thursday, November 29, 2012 - When sexy Venus is in your sign, you are even more inclined to delve into the shadows as you seek the magic that often is shrouded in darkness. Today you have a desire to go even deeper, as Venus dances with physical Mars. The only thing that can stand in your way now is you; buried treasure awaits your discovery so face your insecurities and start digging.

Ooh a sneak peek at tomorrow's one was kinda intriguing too! ^^

So, how you guys all doing today?

Have a great day/evening all, and i'll catch yous later!

Muah!

Jinx Pinx Schminx

Yeah, i know of no one that can Jinx the way i can!

You know that post from yesterday?

Well you can cancel it!

My luck ran out last night. Yep! I wanted spanking? Yes. Not this kinda spanking though. This spanking was no fun. Not laughs and giggles and squirming. It was gritting teeth and tears. It was....dispelling demons in my head. It was...not fun and games.

Also my attitude was different last night. I was no longer feeling warm and connected and loving. I can't say when that changed. I can pinpoint the last thing i did to embody that feeling, but nothing more than that. Maybe Sir can, i dunno.

We'd been watching the second installment of Underworld. Normally i can't watch these things -sadly, because horror stuff was all that i used to watch once upon a time =(

Anyways, with Sir it seems possible. Although this time maybe i didn't walk away from it completely scot free. Afterwards my head was...noisy. I'm not sure i can explain that better than that rather than noise it's pictures. Images, relentlessly flashing behind my retina, and no, it's not nice cuddly pictures.

Head feels a bit like this....

....

....and sees a bit like this:

i was considering at making these ones into an animated gif. -but that would just be stupid right?!
Sometimes the geek in me takes over o.O

And yes i Googled that shit! Clever? Not in the least! Guess what next search brought up? Yep the one thing that i absolutely cannot take AT ALL! Yeah, it's what i used to see at night when i was once borderline-psychotic; the fucking girl in The Exorcist (and no that was not a pun, didn't even think of it at first). OK, i'm sharing a bit much here now.....TOO much i think.Anyways....spanking usually helps. Sometimes it starts it but it also relieves it. I'm not gonna use it as an excuse to say that was the reason for my attitude, nor will i say i should not have gotten punished. They were not really related issues.You know, i've really lost my thread here...as you surely have noticed!My phone is calling me, and has been for like the past 2 mins, so i'll go check that then see if i can remember what the fuck i'm talking about when i get back (insert eyeroll).2 mins later: Do i? Do i fuck. Oh well...i guess we skip all the freakish stuff that will just make all of you see me as a freak and go back to the spanking part you all feel at home with.
Yeah, the spanking.It was....endurance.Nothing else.Although nice at the same time. Or nice is not the word, but maybe good?A bit like exorcising demons (excuse the bad pun).Trying to remember what the actual spanking consisted of....Crop, belt, shoe horn. Hand. The usual suspects i suppose.Funny how 1 activity can be perceived so differently in 2 different circumstances huh?
My head's a mess after writing this. Disregard everything i've said, i probably shouldn't have posted it -but you know me, i can't help myself once it is written.

Oh btw, if you're wondering, the spanking ~~and later 2 benzo~~ made sure i slept just beautifully all night long -until Sir wanted me for sex that is ;)

*LOL*

Ciao for now!

Next time i'll try to be more..."normal"

- i promise! (ehm, kinda...)

(Oh and now we're downloading the last movie of the trilogy -wish me luck! *lol* =P)